Tuesday, 14 March 2017

Life has shredded my word count

Hi. *takes deep breath* This post is the most writing I have done in two weeks. This is very unusual for me. 

The reason? Stuff has happened. Namely, university. (And it's great so far, by the way. Just in case you were wondering. I haven't gotten severely lost yet, which is wonderful. I might do a post next week about my experiences so far, so hang in there with the questions.) 

FYI not a tattoo, just plain old ink.

I'm beginning to remember how life can happen. And when life happens, my word count disappears into a little hole in the ground, pulls a pillow over its head and wails like a small child who's recently dropped the cone of their favourite ice cream (chocolate, by the way). (It also has a little tantrum like Anakin Skywalker when people tell him what to do. (Pick your favourite simile and go with it.))

Have you ever heard the phrase "writers write"? The point is that you are a writer if you write. The end. You don't need a fancy badge or degree or published book to be a writer, which I absolutely love. 

But can I be a writer if I'm not writing right now? 

My mind is filled with to-do lists and math, of pre-reading checklists and timetables. I'm not thinking about my writing. I'm not thinking about my blog, about reading. I have other things to think about right now, but that doesn't mean I'm giving up with my dream of being an author. 

I'm still a writer. I'm just not writing today. I probably won't write tomorrow. And my identity as a writer is going to change as I transition through life, but just because I'm going through a busy time in life doesn't mean that I can just drop part of my identity. 

Does life ever eat your word count? Have you had to give up something you love when life gets busy? 

Tuesday, 7 March 2017

The Perfect Afternoon (gap year wrap-up)

As of the day I'm writing this (Sunday afternoon), this is my last day of freedom. Um, gap year. (Same thing.)

This year has been... incredible. Amazing. There have been a few bumps along the way, of course, as always, and some stuff has happened that I would have never imagined happening twelve months ago. But here we are. I've gone to Orientation for uni, I've bought my brand-new beautiful laptop, I have all my notebooks and pens and textbooks and a very expensive calculator, and I have all my pre-reading for Monday's classes done. First up? Fundamentals of Engineering. (I've decided to rename it Ninja Fundamentals, though. (Statics is Time's not Static (it's wibbly wobbly, timey wimey) and Applied Mathematics is Balance of Probability, my dear Watson, because I'm weird like that.) 

I'm scared out of my mind. (But that's ok. That's how we grow.) 

I cannot express how thankful I am to have had this year. I've grown so much as a writer and as a person, and none of it would have been possible without the amazing support of my family, friends, and of course God. (Let's give credit where credit is due.) I have had the most amazing time this year, and I couldn't have done it without a couple of amazing people. 

There have been a few specific afternoons that have been absolutely perfect this year, and that's how I want to remember it. I want to remember my curtains swaying in the breeze, my skin stained with ink as I fill pages of my journal. I want to remember dancing around the house with my music blasted, spending hours curled up in bed with a really good book, drinking too much tea for my own good. I loved the silence in the house when it's only me and my thoughts, the weight of everything I can't control off my chest for a few short hours, learning how to draw, learning how to write, learning how to speak French, learning about what it means to be me. Those are the afternoons I want to remember. They were the hours when my soul could finally breathe, and I am so thankful to have had them. 

And to everyone considering taking a gap year, let me assure you that I'm completely at rest with my decision. I have no regrets, no second thoughts. It's not right for everyone, of course. Think about your options, your reasons behind it, what you're going to do. Then take a deep breathe, plunge into whatever your decision is and don't look back. 

Did you take a gap year, or go straight to college/university? What's your perfect afternoon?