Sunday, 6 September 2015

Bonus Post: Why I do not want to rule the world

Tons of people want to rule the world. Bookworms/movieworms (I suppose that's what movie fans are called) know this, thanks to many, many, (many) villains who want to rule the world. (Or the Tri-State Area, in Doofenshmirtz's case.) 


Doofenshmirtz. This is what all
world rulers should look like. 

But I do not want to rule the world. Mostly because I would suck at it, and I have a list to prove it. 

1) You must be awesome. All. The. Time. Everyone knows that world rulers are awesome. And while I'm not denying the claim that I am awesome, even I know that I cannot be completely fabulous all the time. Besides, once people find out that you aren't as amazing as you should be they start revolts. Revolutions! Executions! Riots! They are a lot more fun in the movies than when you are hiding in the bunker in your palace. 

2) You have to create laws and boring stuff like that (including paperwork and meetings). I, like most law-abiding citizens, like laws. They stop our society from falling into a world where chaos and ruin reign and where Artemis Fowl books are burned. (I like rules very much because I love Artemis Fowl very much.) Can you imagine all the meetings you'd have to go to? If I take over the world I would have to wipe out all previous laws and start over, and it would take forever to decide on rules. The consumer laws alone would take all of my reading time. *sobs*

3) People will always try to overthrow/assassinate/dethrone you. Accept it. It will happen at one time or another, even if you are an awesome and kind and smart world ruler. Someone will think they are better than you and try to take you out. I like not dying. 


It's all well and good when you're on the side of the
revolutionaries, but it's not so much fun when you're President Snow.

4) It is your fault when something goes wrong. When children are starving, who do you think they will run to with pitchforks and torches? When the aliens come, who do you think will have to make first contact? I do not like responsibility, my jabberwockies. 

5) People do not like to obey orders. Seriously, there are laws and people do not follow them. Do not drink and drive and do not speed. Right? There is a show where police go after people who are speeding and driving drunk. (Even better is the Border Security show. Love it!) I would have to install tough laws and I don't like punishing people (unless they make me angry). Eventually I would have to install instant-death laws where if you do something I don't like a lightning bolt will fall out of the sky and fry you, then the humanitarians will get upset and see point three. 

Hence, I will not be taking over the world any time soon. 

Do you want to rule the world? Why or why not? And what kind of minions would you have if you did? 

4 comments:

  1. Hmm, I can totally respect your reasons for not wanting to rule the world. And who am I to try to convince you otherwise? I plan to rule it too, and there can only be one world ruler. I get the issues about the laws--obviously I will need to delegate a lot, and I will have to bribe the people with gifts of coffee and chocolate and free books. So yeah, the system has a few kinks that need to be worked out. But since I'm already invincible/immortal (in my dreams of course), I won't have to worry about getting assassinated.

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    1. Fair enough :) you go ahead and take over, I'll sit in the back and watch. And may I please live under your rule? All I require are books and chocolate and I'll feed you any information about potential revolutionaries. Ah, good, you've got that minor detail worked out. I was just going to have about three million guards, but being invincible will do it. Thanks for commenting!

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  2. XD This is exactly like all the reasons I posted as to why I have serious doubts about all the people who want to rule the world. Of course, NO ONE LISTENED TO ME and everyone thought they could rule the world anyway. But I appreciate the reasonable self-reflection you have committed to, and I like that. Thanks for not taking over the world, Victoria!

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    1. I know! People think they can just take over the world like *snap* that. There's so much work to do and revolutions to avoid! We can sit back together and watch at everyone else attempts to take over the world. Thank you, I do like to think about things like taking over the world before rushing into it. Anytime :) Thanks for commenting!

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